Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
