Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
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