Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
