margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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