Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
Randomize
