I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Randomize