im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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