Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
