Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize