We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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