I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I'm passing your future prison.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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