well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
