is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
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