she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
