margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Randomize
