i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize