Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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