is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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