Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Randomize
