i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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