Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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