I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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