Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
