i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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