Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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