i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
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