Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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