Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Randomize
