WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
you made out with another girl for some wings
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
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