yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
