so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
