YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize
