May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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