i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
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