My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize