Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Randomize
