i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Randomize
