i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
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