I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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