Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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