Who did Billy Mays play for?
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
