Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Randomize
