so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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