I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
is it fun? or sober?
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
