went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
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