idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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