I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
