FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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