rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
operation have a gay friend backfired
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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