I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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