Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
