Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
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