Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
40s are totally the cure
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
